Our six and a halfth birthday is just around the corner, so we are gearing up for our infamous annual tradition of celebrating our Half-Assed Half Birthday! Explore Kelnero in its full dressed down glory as we become a dive bar for a day, then continue to revel in our torn jeans, janky tees, and assless chaps through the weekend.

Look forward to food and drink specials that fully embrace a half-assed approach to life, celebrated in true Kelnero fashion. Think Green Tea shots, Porn Stars, plastic drinkware (EGAD), and more shenanigans.

New this year: scratch tickets with prizes and discounts, and TWO tattoo pop-ups in collaboration with our friendly neighbors over at Main St. Tattoo! Show up early on Wednesday, August 13 (our actual half birthday), and Monday, August 18 (Industry Night), to get access to a custom Kelnero flash sheet and secure your spot in line.

No reservations, come as you are, half-assed attire encouraged but not necessary. Cheers b*#&%^s.